Archive for May, 2009

I’m wide awake it’s morning

31/05/2009

As is now usual, at half 4 (at least I think it’s half 4, I’ve crossed more time zones than your average Dr. Who on this train journey) my regular early morning scenic awakening occurred. It was all very fleeting but there were giant steaming rivers and pools everywhere. It was like being on a volcanoe, in fact it was more like Jurassic Park than the Jurassic Park ride at Universal Studios. No sooner were they seen than it was back to standard wide open billboard America; Jack’s biscuits 1 mile. It was a fine wake-up call though.

Throughout my adventures I’ve noticed that there is an almost overwelming amount of water in USA and I’ve not even beheld The Great Lakes yet. It’s all very impressive.

Right, I’m now going to attempt to reassemble my spinal cord and get a tad more kip. Zzzzzzz, ouch, zzzzzzz, ouch, zzzzzzz, ouch … and so forth.

I feel like I’ve aged 6 months for every week on this trip and though sometimes the rewards have been scant, there have been some great ones. America sure is a mighty pertty Country. God bless eh.

So I’m 4 or 5 hours away from Chicago now and am currently in the State of Wisconsin. The Wisconsin Dales should be coming up shortly and they are supposed to be scenic so I’ll keep an eye out.

I must have missed them. Crivens.

There’s a hotdog from Portillo’s (a World famous dog seller that has been recommended to me by several people, I even think Stephen Fry went there on the Illinois leg of his State by State tour) with my name on it when I get there. Though I shouldn’t really as I’ve ate $40 worth of rubbish in the past couple of days on this here train. Monday tomorrow, health kick I reckon.

Frost Nixon, just watched it I did. I find Watergate a fascinating period of recent American history so it’s of no shock to myself that I thouroughly enjoyed this flick. There’s a great dark comic undertone running through the whole thing that I appreciated and while Michael Sheen just offers a ever so slightly modified rehash of his Tony Blair performance, it works. I can’t believe David Frost was a playboy though, who’d have thought it.

I just overheard a charasmatic Amtrak employ who decided to randomly share a story with some equally random passengers to my right. It made me laugh as though it was a simple tale he told it in an entertaining and charming manner with snakeoil salesman like efficiency. I may be substituting the odd word but the sentiment is the same, here goes:

“Wanna know what happens to a man who has been on a train for 3 days without the sanctuary of sleep? He picks up a broken rogue pen lying on the floor of the viewing gallery cabin. He then proceeds to carefully push out the plastic ink repository with a paperclip he has just produced and dilligently unwound with his own hands. This act complete, he next purposely strides to the nearest rest room and tears what is deemed adequate ammunition from the paper towel tray. Finally he goes in search of his fellow crew members”.

BTW I slept through Fargo, drat 100 times fold say I.

I’m in Chicago now, my first impressions are good. The hostel is huge. Time to catch up with the World I reckon, see ya tomorrow.

A river runs through it

30/05/2009

Sleeping is an art form on these tin cans, one I have yet to master. I didn’t do very well last night, 2 hours maybe. I’ve done better this morning though, have maybe doubled my tally in lots of little fits and spurts.

When I awoke last night at half 4 the sun was already on the way up and I keenly followed the path of the most serene and placid river ever to be in my sight. I wanted to jump in and fish it instantly, even in my half-baked slumber. I’m not sure if we were in Idaho, or more likely Montana.

The train having no power outlets (not even in the viewing gallery) is a bit of a pain, as I type this I’m having to do it from a smeggy bathroom where there is power for charging razors. Not a pleasent way to blog but also necessary so that I can listen to podcasts and such like.

I might watch ‘Frost Nixon’ on my phone in a bit, though that will mean another 1 hour visit to the water closet for a recharge. Can you imagine you had to go and sit in the little boys/ladies room for 60 minutes first every time you went to the cinema? Give it a miss wouldn’t ya.

At 2:13 am tonight (or technically tomorrow morning but I never look at it like that) we are due to stop in Fargo, North Dakota – of Coen Brothers fame. If I’m awake (and what else will I be while a guest on one of these giant contraptions) I’ll try and get a decent photo.

The day has passed without much event really, there’s been no interesting characters and once we got past Glacier National Park in Montana the scenery became, dare I say it, dull. I’ve basically read all day and played Sim City on the phone, a most frustrating game.

Also, due to my phone (there is a running theme to this post I thinks) not having the requisite charge at the opportune times, I haven’t even got a worthy photo to share. Here’s one of a bowling alley in Utah taken a couple of weeks ago late in the evening from my reclined train seat. I imagined Walter and The Dude having some tiff or other on the lanes. As yet I haven’t had the opportunity to experience a full on American bowling alley, still time yet though folks.

Empire Builder

29/05/2009

So I just made the coach by 4 minutes this morning after an intense power walk and some well judged short cuts. Phew. 4 hours on this mudda and then the real fun begins, 2206 miles across 7 states on the Empire Builder line.

A fellow from Dublin told me a story the other day and if true (I’m not going to fact check so I don’t vouch for it’s accuracy) it’s incredibly imoral. He reckoned that as Vancouver has quite a lot of homeless people (which it does) many of whom have mental issues, when the City hosts the next Winter Olympics there will be temporary funding for treatment which will get the crazies off the streets so to speak. When the games are done the funding dries up and the treatment stops, that’s awful, no?

Vancouver also has some unusual alcohol laws, most places seem to be subject to enforcing a rule where by food (a bag of dry roasted not qualifying) must be purchased after every 2 drinks, or a rule pretty close to that anyway. Conversely, weed is pretty much universally accepted if discression is applied. These crazy Canucks.

Speaking of Canadians, I heard from JM (the Montrealian of beer pong fame) and he willl be in the Windy City at the same time and same hostel as me, so that’s good. Nice to know a friend awaits.

I got in to Seattle with an hour and a half to spare before my train departs so in earnest (and ultimately in vain) I set out to find a liquer store to replenish my bourbon supply as is now traditional. Nowt doing though so the meagre remains sloshing around in a lonely fashion at the bottom of my hipflask from the last venture, will have to suffice.

Currently I’m enjoying Moby Dick (though Melville does digress from the story far too often) with the odd glance up to take in the beautiful (and seemingly never ending) Washington State beaches. I’m pretty sure I just saw an American bald eagle, wowzers.

A bit further on and I’m now in the Cascades Mountains watching various fast flowing rivers interlock, beautiful. The joy is being mitigated by the loud and annoying kids behind me a bit mind. On the bright side I did just here one of them say “Mummy, what’s that?” to which the reply was “the emergency exit dear”. Go on, pull it. I dare ya.

This train is a bit crap compared to the other long haul ones I’ve been on, I think it’s a slightly older model. No power points and there isn’t the usual cafe cabin (with a decent and not too pricey variety), just the very expensive proper dining car. Apparently they might add one tomorrow or something.

The snap is of a notice in the toilet on the coach I was on. I think it means if you’re Johnny Cash you have to sit down to pee. I suppose they could take it down now really.

Deres more ta Ireland, dan dis

29/05/2009

Last night was pretty much a repeat of the previous one with Niall and various other Irish people (with the odd Aussie thrown in for good measure). I didn’t go to bed until 6. Ouch.

Despite this I’ve had a reasonably productive day and actually managed to see something of Vancouver today. I’ve done a good 10K of walking minimum, mainly round the gorgeous Stanley Park in the city centre. I walked the entire circumfrence of it and took in various lagoons and beaches while being suitably entertained by a constant stream of bronzed rollerblading ladies.

I even got to see a couple of raccoons dicking about at the edge of Lost Lagoon. Funny little fellas. I didn’t see any coyotes (ugly or otherwise) though which are also apparently knocking about.

So tomorrow begins the monster leg of the trip. I get a bus back to Seattle in the morning which will take 4 hours and from there I then transfer to the rails and embark on a 45 hour voyage to Chicago. Crikey.

I forgot to mention that I got a right grilling from the customs dude on the way into Canada. He kept trying to trip me up by asking me the same questions again. I kept cool though as I knew I had nowt to worry about. I hope I don’t get the same on my way back into The States though.

War of The Roses

27/05/2009

There is a bar in the hostel serving reasonably priced lager so I indulged with my room mate, Niall from Limerick. Nice chap.

There once was a man from Limerick, erm. It can’t be done, just ask John Cooper Clarke. He’s a professional.

I’m feeling somewhat tender now though and have basically wasted the day moping about and playing pool. There’s nothing worse than a bad game of pool and I just had 9 of them, I’m blaming the table though as it has more dead wood than the Newcastle squad.

I did make it up in time to watch the 2nd half of The World’s Greatest Club against ‘Man Yoo’ though. Men against boys.

There is a fella here from Scarborough with a thick Yorkshire accent who is a rag fan, I don’t get it. I think I upset him when I asked why he’s a United fan if he’s from Scunthorpe, oops.

I’ll make up for my wastage tomorrow and get up early, hell I might even head over to Bowen Island if the fancy takes me.

As I’ve not been out of the hostel today, photo opportunities have been limited. So here is ‘rat-cat-dog’ from my time in San Francisco.

A wealth in common

26/05/2009

When I arrive in the land of maples and mounties I’ve got a date with some serious shut-eye. I did just get around an hour via a power nap, which I think may qualify as my longest consecutive stretch on one of these long haul Amtrak bad boys. Annoyingly it could have been longer but the driver has for some reason become trigger happy with his horn (which sounds like an out of tune Hammond organ) and is giving it a very loud toot every few seconds. I’m unsuccessfully trying to drown it out with Patrick Wolf’s ‘Wind In The Wires’. Set of b@stards.

Signs outside are telling me that I’m in Skagit County. It’s a drizzly day in Skagit. Drizzle, I’ve not seen that in quite some time.

I’m now in Vancouver, British Columbia (I thought British Columbia is what occurs in toilet cubicles the UK over on a Friday and Saturday night), Canada. Lots of customs jiggery pokery going on, it’s taking ages. Anyone would think it was still the prohibition era.

Canadian money is a bit odd, similar to Monopoly money. It does have the Queen on it though, good to see the old girl again.

A relatively short one today. The photo is just of a beach on the Pacific right near the Canadian border.

The New World

26/05/2009

The Experience Music Project was pretty good, mainly because upstairs they had all these interactive instruments which were basically real instruments modified to tutor you how to play. I spent hours bashing away on the drums and more working on my blues guitar solos with scales. I got my money’s worth that’s for sure.

The entry fee also got you into the Sci-fi Museum which was pretty well done but although I like science fiction I’m not a huge fan so I only spent about 10 minutes there.

$16 just to go up a lift seemed like a lot so I passed on the Space Needle which was the other attraction I was planning on visiting today, it’s not actually that tall anyway, practically a midget in American terms.

I’m at that festival again but I can’t really be bothered with it now, I’m getting a bit freaked out by the quantity of clearly mentally unstable people in close proximity. I’ve just had my tea (chicken tikka masala from the Indian stand) so I might leave it there.

The amount of beggars in The States is starting to disgust me, I’m sure plenty of them have genuine reasons but plenty more are clearly not homeless and are just after something for nothing. Some of them look like they haven’t missed a meal in decades and more often than not have 2nds. Do one.

I’m booked on the half 7 train to Vancouver tomorrow, so with the buses involved to get to the station I’ll have to be up about half 5. Booooo!

My next destination will have me in a whole new country. I’m like Neil Armstrong I am, only without the spacesuit and moon buggy. Actually, I’m nothing like Neil Armstrong. Judith Chalmers maybe.

Seaview Avenue

25/05/2009

I’ve awoke really early this morning and even though I’m cream crackered I can’t sleep. So here is an early morning bonus/bogus post. Who loves ya baby.

The photo is a view I took in shortly after getting the number 17 bus to Ballard where my hostel is.

Free hugs

24/05/2009

This morning I was given a lift to the 38th Annual Northwest Folklife Festival by a nice bloke from the hostel.

He is a SQL DBA (reformed from a weed dealer of 40 years after 2 and half years in the big house) so he grilled me for a bit of IIS advice with mixed results mainly due to my accent rather than any lack of technical knowledge.

The suggested donation on entry is $10 but we got in for nowt as my guide knew a sneaky entrance, such evils are necessary for travellers in the name of budget extension.

At the moment I’m watching a Seattle band called ‘Central Services’ who have a decent sound, somewhere between Grandaddy and Belle and Sebastian. But they are trying much too hard on the quirky front and the forced intellect does them no favours.

Shortly before that I watched a group of 4 bluegrass buskers called ‘Water Tower Bucket Boys’ who were briliant. I got me a CD for $5.

I’ve never seen such a wide variety of food available anywhere. I just ate a Philippine style BBQ Chicken combo which entailed a pork skewer, 2 lumpia (like spring rolls) and pancit noodles. Nicely washed down with a glass of strawberry lemonade from the Vietnamese stand.

Odd people everywhere. Loads of ‘em. The place is also full of unofficial muscians; some bad, some good, some great and some bloody awful. It makes for a very interesting festival and lessens the pain of missing out on Sasquatch!.

I don’t get all this hippy ‘free hugs’ business though. I may be but a cynical and miserable Brit, but I find it all very cringe-worthy.

Just watched another skiffle rag time sort of band called 2nd Street Rag Stompers, they were a bit rougher round the edges than the other lot but still very good. Like The Hokum Clones doing covers of Black Lips numbers. I bought their CD, this place is not good for budget extension. The pic is of them.

It’s absolutely heaving here now, baby steps all the way.

Next up was the most amazing yoyo(ist) you’re ever likely to see. This kid is 15 and the stuff he can do with a bit of plastic and string is stunning. I thought about showing him ‘walk the dog’ as it doesn’t appear to be in his repertoire, maybe he’s not ready yet though. Sterling Quinn is his name and he was runner up in the World Championship last year. No doubt he is on YouTube so have a look.

I’ve just left early as although it’s really good it can get a bit boring by yourself after 6 hours, plus it’s mega chocca now. I may have had a gourmet chocolate brownie on the way out.

I’ll probably go back tomorrow as there is some ska stuff on, plus I still need to go to the Space Needle and the Experience Music Project/Science Fiction Museum which are both right where the festival is.

Not much on for tonight unless something comes up. There is a mini cinema downstairs with a projector and 14 proper theatre seats so I might just watch a flick. Not hostel though which is one of the DVDs on offer. I’ve also bought some Blue Ribbon in which has become my American beer of choice; cheap and tasty.

Eat my shorts

23/05/2009

I ended up going out last night with a right gimpy crowd from the hostel, all sorts of different people and nationalities. There was one posh girl from Luxembourg with a disgusting outlook on life who hadn’t been informed that the yuppy scene was cancelled many moons ago. Honestly she was like the direct female equivalent of ‘American Psycho’.

The group soon split and I went to a late bar with 2 decent British lads, one from South Wales and one from Worcestershire (who was a decent lookey likey for Ryan Adams/Simon Amstel/Luke Kook), both named Tom. So it was a fairly reasonable night in the end. Very tired now.

Mild invigoration is occuring within me though as I’ve just read the pamphlet for the Spanish made single decker train on the Cascades route to Seattle. Apparently there are gratis movies, coolio. I board in an hour. Cheerio Portland.

I just tried my first and last corn dog (corn batter around a chicken frankfurter on a stick). It tasted not too bad but it felt akin to a fried mars bar in the highlands of Scotland, which was also a one off event for me. Wrong.

On the train (quite swanky it is too) now and the Oregon/Washington State border has just been crossed. No movie on yet but there’s a screen at least so here’s hoping. Saying that if anything with Jennifer ‘made for the small screen’ Aniston or Matthew ‘mahognany’ McConaughay (I’m talking about chick flicks readers) comes on there will be blood on the tracks, my own.

We’ve just pulled in to Tacoma and ‘Paul Blart: Mall Cop’ (with Kevin James basically being a poor man’s John Candy) has just finished on the idiot box. Pretty rubbish really but there were little bits that made me smirk, there’s worse ways to spend 90 minutes.

Okay, in Seattle now. I’m a bit annoyed with myself for not booking The Green Tortoise downtown where everyone else I know who has visited Seattle has stayed and rated it. This place I’m in seems nice enough but is bloomin’ miles away! So I’m just having a quiet night and catching up on my kip.

The photo is of a paving stone outside a school that I noticed when idlely walking back from Washington Park yesterday. He is the fella that created The Simpsons, Matt Groening. He’s a Portlonian (I may have just made that term up) you see.

A fella walks into the Doctor’s office and says:

“Doc, I think I’m going deaf”

“Okay sir, well let’s see. So what are the symptoms?”

“That funny yellow family off the TV”

Badum chhh. Parka fully zipped up over my slightly rouge face.


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